Pizza,Root Beer & An Old Guitar.

Last Thursday was actually my good friend's birthday but since I was busy with work and also he himself was actually busy with class,we decided to celebrate it on Saturday instead.Our original plan (planned by Mr Elias) was to buy his favourite burger and put candles on it,but for some reason I thought it'd be better if we bought a pizza instead and write Happy Birthday using Smarties or M&Ms.So guess what?It was the right decision!Turns out Izat was craving for pizza but didn't have time to actually buy some *silent victory hooray* So we went to his house and surprised him with his pizza "cake".

A smiling 19 years old boy with his pizza.

Weirdness Is Good.

Best friend and insyaAllah more.Amin.

And through it all,you're still right here next to me.Cracking stupid jokes just to make me laugh,letting me win every single stupid fights we have just to make me happy,being childish and weird with me just to make me feel normal,listening to my never-ending ramblings just to see me smile and all the other wonderful things you've given to me.It's almost been what,roughly 4 years now since we first met?And yet we're still the same dorky best friends that we were in Form 3 till now and insyaAllah,maybe more in the future.Amin.

Forgiveness

And through this catastrophe which I had built by myself,I wish to find solace in You.I wish to run away from all the worldly matters and just start fresh.I wish to repent but sadly,I could no longer shed the tears that I wish to shed for You.Hungry desires fueled the empty corner of my heart and slowly,I began to shrink away into this caving darkness.Take me out of this darkness please...

VIA CALCIUMMS

Can I Just Run Away For A While?

VIA KUROI-HIMITSU

I don't know how long I can continue to keep these walls of mine from crumbling.Your constant fighting has made me weaker and weaker everyday.I wish to disappear from this present time and fade away into the past that once held so many happy memories.I've lost count of the tears that I have shed, and I've forgotten what it felt like to feel this odd emotion called happiness when I'm around you.So many days have passed and I pray that we would find our way out of this catastrophe that has befallen on us.And yet,somewhere in the darkest corner of my heart,I no longer hold any hope for us.

Paracosm.

VIA TWISTEDTHEORY

I like ice cream...I want one now.

I think somehow,I'm still stuck in my own paracosm.Whenever I feel like escaping reality,paracosm embraces me with a warm welcome.I'm not even sure if that's good or bad but I gotta feeling - not the song - that somewhere along this road,I'm gonna get myself stuck in a big trouble if don't get rid of my paracosm.

What am I talking about?

Flaws Are Perfection.

 VIA TWISTEDTHEORY

I hate this insecure feeling I have when I see you smile ever so casually with another.I hate these nasty thoughts that start to consume my mind when you both start to fight.I hate this melancholy feeling that washes over me when I see the people I used to care about disappear from my life.I hate all the ungrateful things I say to myself when I look in the mirror.One day I will accept these flaws and make it into something positive.

Syukran...

That moment when you're not pure and you really wanna hear the beautiful verses of the Qur'an for comfort,and He showed the wonders of His bounty by allowing you to listen to Surah Al-Kahf through technology.Subhanallah,indeed You are The Almighty.

Magic Hands.

After so long of not drawing,I finally drew a picture today and guess what?Still got those magic hands *laugh*

Messed up the foot though...

Reminiscence.

VIA CALCIUMMS

I close my eyes and I remember.I remember the red bricks that was gradually being eroded away by the weather,the apple tree in the backyard with it's ripened apples falling ever so gently in slow motion.I remembered the blooming tulips that we planted together during spring,the old bathtub that smelled of strawberries.I remember the old heater that was my sanctuary during the fierce winter,the old floorboards that creaked with every movement.I remember the attic that was full with antique items,left to be covered in dust,forgotten and abandoned.I remember walking to school in the cold,with my scarf high up to my nose to protect me from the cold,the fallen autumn leaves that spoke when people walked on it.I remember the park with its beautiful white swans,yellow ducklings and sneaky ducks.I remember the raspberry bush covered with fat raspberry that hung from its thin vine,waiting for a cheeky hand to set it free.I remember the snowman that melted away at the start of spring,fading away from existence.

I remember the laughter.

I remember the tears.

I remember everything.

Then I woke up.

And I realised...

It was just a memory from the past.

Nii

Suki na hito ni wa suki tte tsutaerunda...

VIA ETERNALDRE4MER

...I'll say I love you to the person I love.

Ichii

Sen no yoru wo koete ima anata ni ai yukou...

 VIA FUDOU

...I'll overcome the thousands of night and head out to meet you right now.

It's Done.

The tiger looking pot is the cookie jar.I need energy to write!

After countless researching,planning and mental torture,level 1 for our educational game is done!Can I just say how hard it is to actually plan a game?I thought that it'd be easy but boy was I wrong.My hardest obstacle was too summarise the storyline into the simplest possible for the programmers.Okay,I know it may sound easy but for someone like me who loves metaphorical words and graphical similes,it is hard.Even then,my boss still had to re-summarise my story for the programmers.But overall,this job is kinda exciting.I get to research about things that I already knew for basic knowledge but more deeply and places that I didn't even know about for ideas for sceneries.Designing the game itself is awesome too.I get to play games for assignments.How cool is that eh? *wink wink*

Serendipity

"They bid farewell to the bull and followed the path of the small river. Tall trees shaded the area and the sweet scent of blooming flowers intoxicated the area and danced with the wind. The gentle sound of trickling water made the area seemed even more serene. The wind blew ever so gently against their faces almost as if cooing them to sleep and somewhere in the forest, humming birds sang their lullaby..."

Childhood Movies.

I stayed up to watch a movie that I couldn't watch once upon a time in my childhood's past.I even forgot the title till I saw a GIF of it on tumblr.I regret not watching The Girl Who Leapt Through Time when I was smaller.It could have been like a collection of childhood movies.Hate the fact that that baka Chiaki didn't kiss Makoto.At least a peck on the cheek idiot!!! *fuming* I am so gonna rewatch Byousoku 5cm and all the Studio Ghibli production.

Byousoku 5cm.

The Girl Who Leapt Through Time.

Screw you Japanese producer.Why must you make me cry while I watch your movies?!

It's Done!

I was bored so I decided to use the henna that someone left at our house.I drew the pattern myself (on my left hand) and asked my dad to draw the exact pattern on my right hand.My mum joked and said that I looked like I'm about to get married *laughs* I wonder...would people think I just got married if I went out and wore my mum's engagement ring and dressed maturely?Hmmm....

Talking Is Better Than Being Silent.

Hello stranger,

 VIA FARAFAIRYTALES

At first,I wanted to be the drama queen who would not budge first but I guess your constant calling and text message soften my ego.Someone told me that if Allah Himself can forgive others than who am I,His servant,to not forgive and punish His creation?That made me thinking and besides,this is merely a small ditch that we have fallen into.All we have to do is just give a push to one another to get back up on the even land.I'm glad that we talked to each other and guess what?Don't you think that we've gotten one step closer to each other?We understood,compromise and worked together to solve the problem step by step.Brilliant team work there *cyber high five*

I Shall.

 VIA L0STINL0VE

Hate Is A Strong Word.

My life is a mess.I wish that I can turn this thing called emotions off.I wish that my parents would stop fighting and start talking.I wish that my cousins,aunties and uncles would just stop ignoring us and start supporting us.I wish that all those people who said bad things about us will realise the mistakes that they have made.I wish that all this misery would just go away.



Ya Allah,give me more patience and if this trial is really meant for me then please,I beg you,stop making me walk in circles and show me the way.My strength is fading and my patience is gradually decreasing.Don't let me stray from the Right path...

VIA TWISTEDTHEOR

Again.

The truth is I'm hurt.I don't understand how you can get annoyed about my current intern.How do you think I feel when you told me that you went to see her and her mum (even if it is for "academic" purpose) or the fact that you're going out with that girl and her boyfriend?I know it's nothing for you but just went I managed to get rid of unwanted feelings,you throw them back at me and made me feel like shit.I thought that I was okay with it but I'm not now.

Bitting My Tongue.

I'm sorry if I hurt you or offended you but honestly,I can't deal with this right now.I'm sorry if I made you feel like I didn't care,I'm really sorry.I wish that I could have been there for you but I can't.I'm sorry if my constant story-telling about my life bores you to death but that's just who I am.I wish that we can sort the problem right now but you know what?I'm done solving problems.I don't want to solve any more problem.I just wanna push all of my problems into one room,lock the door and throw the key.I so can't deal with this mess anymore.I've got this annoying flu that just wont go away,my family problem is a mess and now you're upset with me?Here's a suggestion;why don't the whole world just freaking declare war with me?!

Working

I was at work with my mum today.Felt like a grown up (I know I am but you know that feeling of dressing up formally and carrying your laptop around with some books and stationary in your bag?Get the gist?).Never could get rid of the dorky face xD

Mama's office.

We Are So Watching This!!

Isn't it cool or what?! :D

Cause Y'All Need To Leave Me Alone!

That annoying moment when someone says something about your imperfection and deep down you feel like strangling 'em but on the outside you plaster a fake smile on your face and go "Oh,I'll try and fix that for you." *Hysterical scream* Someone get me a bloody riffle so I can shoot these annoying people who thinks they're all that.FYI,no one,and I repeat for emphasis,no one is perfect except for Him!Kapish?

via: haihane 

Innocence Is Cute.

Found this vid of my baby brother singing along to One Direction's song,One Thing.He's actually singing but he's only 2 years old so the words aren't really right.So adorable *pinches his cheeks*

P.s. There's a part where he said "Kakngah,nak oh oh!".Kakngah is me (it means second sister in Malay) and oh oh is One Direction-What Makes You Beautiful (the chorus: You don't know oh oh!You don't you're beautiful...)

A Lesson In Life.

 VIA L0STINL0VE

I hate seeing people who wishes for their life to better than it already is.Trust me it ain't worth the wish (unless of course your life is really messed up then that's an exception).I've been in that position before,that position when you're so ungrateful with life and keep on praying for something "exciting" to happen.
I always prayed to be more beautiful than my sisters cause no one really paid attention to me,I always prayed to be more outstanding than my other siblings so that my parents will notice me,I always prayed to have a better,more "supporting" and cool family than the one I had and other pathetic prayers.But you know what?I didn't realise that I already had those things.
I am beautiful,my family and him always reminded me (excuse the vanity but hey,all of His creation are beautiful *smile* ).I am outstanding but of course I can never be more outstanding than my other siblings,cause we're all different.We have our talents and flaws.That's what made us who we are.And my family were supporting,they were cool,they were kind and caring and everything more.
But I couldn't see that.Correction,I could see that but I refused to acknowledge it.I drowned myself in my own desires and He decided to test me.He tested me and boy it's friggin hard!But for each hardship that I go through,I'm grateful for it.I've started to open my eyes bit by bit and I realised what a complete moron I was before this.Don't let your desires control you.
Be grateful for every single moment that occurred in your life,cause you never know when He will take it all away from you and replace it with the opposite things that you wished for.

VIA FARAFAIRYTALES

If Only You Knew...

VIA EQUALEQUAL

There is a point in life when you get so tired of everything around you and I think I'm there.I honestly don't know what I'm suppose to be feeling.Should I follow this person or the other?Should I comfort her or him?Should I listen to the one who conceived me or the one who supports me?But honestly speaking,I'm only feeling annoyed and exhausted.I wish that I can put my hands in the air and throw the white flag down.It's getting to the point of being ridiculous now and I'm done playing the good daughter.I'm done feeling guilty over choosing between the two most important people in my life.I'm done feeling like a hopeless person whenever a fight is not solved.I'm done being hurt and feeling attached to the past.I wish that we all can stop clinging to the past and just move on.I'm just so tired and I wish that both of you can see it in our eyes.It's starting to get really ridiculous now...

Ejected!

After enduring a 1 hour (or maybe more) of trying to reload and eject a stupid CD from my Mac,I finally succeeded!Thank you mother for telling to look it up in the MacBook user guide *phew* Glad I'm a good girl who listens to her mum *good girl smile* I don't know how many times I have to force quit and shut down my laptop.Hopefully it wont damage the internal drive or whatever they call it.

I vow to never ever ever insert another Van Hellsing CD into my laptop ever again.Ever!

A Spontaneous Trip.

Waking up in the morning with this view *sigh*

Just got back from Port Dickson last night.We had like a spontaneous trip to the beach and actually didn't plan anything at all,literally.On Saturday morning,while we were having breakfast,my dad was like "Hey,who wants to go to the beach?" Of course we all said yes cause it's been awhile since we had any family get-away so why not right?So we packed our bags,got into the car and went to Port Dickson.When we arrived there,the first thing we done was find a hotel.We actually went on a hotel hunt and I swear a conspiracy occurred cause all of the hotels were booked.It's a conspiracy!!

They actually had this sign around the hotel xD

So we drove around again and stop to pray and voila!A miracle occurred and we got ourselves a nice family room at a hotel that was right next to the beach.Talk about a miracle huh?The view from our room was amazing - minus the view of guys in speedo trying to look cool while jet-skiing - and the short get-away was blissful.We had fun at the beach and actual done some jungle trekking,which was by far the coolest thing that I have ever done.Why?Cause we climbed up a hill that lead us to the highest point in Port Dickson which stood a lighthouse (Tanjung Tuan Lighthouse),and went right down to the sea where the water was so clear,you can actually see the fishes and corals.

It was so beautiful!Made me appreciate my country more.There was even cute little monkeys around the area,just observing us and munching on nuts that my dad threw at them.One of them actually shit and my sister accidentally stepped on it.Gross much? *sigh* wished that I could stay there forever.

You Just Killed My Anticipation.

I thought today will be the day.I thought my results would come out and I would find out if I'm qualified to go to Gombak or not.I thought I'm ready for it...but I'm not and I'm glad.Cause IIUM just post-poned it!It'll come out on the 4th of June instead *victory dance* It means more ice cream and more time to pray!Teheeee ~

Zip it.

VIA L0STINL0VE

Do you know that pissed off feeling when a family member you're not really close to acts like the freaking boss over you?And what's even worse is the fact that they are younger than you and yet they think that they have the authority to boss you around just cause you're quiet.Err hello,go back to freaking kindergarten and learn some friggin manners.Obviously your parents and teachers forgot to teach that vital lesson in life.Don't walk all over me just cause you think you have won this battle cause you didn't honey.Don't act like you're someone significant to me cause I didn't give a shit about you years ago and I still don't.Thank you for your opinion but your opinion don't matter to me so keep it.You guys were the first one to step away from us so don't expect us to get down on our knees and beg for forgiveness.Cause from my point of view,the ones that need to apoligise are you guys,not us.If you have enough guts to leave us,then find that guts again to come and apoligise to us.Don't use the coward way out by making us apoligise to you.It aint cool darling.

1D DVD Watch Party!

VIA HORANYFORPOTATOES
Le boys watching it while being online on Twitter.

Hello again,just finished the party.Don't know what I mean?I shall tell you *fangirl smile* Tonight,well the previous night (Thursday,31st of May), is the awaited 1D DVD Watch Party *directioner screams* At exactly 5:30pm England time,the boys from One Direction and directioners around the world would be watching the Up All Night:The Live Tour DVD at the same time.Of course I joined in while logging onto Twitter.Not to my surprise,the boys were online so of course all the directioners are fighting for their attention,including I'm afraid,myself *directioner weep* Like a loyal directioner who have watched the DVD repeatedly and have memorised the songs by heart,I felt truly connected to the boys since I knew that they were watching with me.Well kinda...Can I just saw how awesome they are and how adorable Niall Horan is in the DVD? *fangirl scream*

P.s. Forgive me for my fangirl act.I am completely under the spell of the One Direction infection.Ngeee ~